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Friday 30 September 2011

Loki was just misunderstood! Oh yeah, and some stuff from Milan Fashion Week as well.

I was looking at the new Milan Fashion Week shows in an attempt to think of some kind of cohesive theme for my first post on this blog, but then I got distracted by Thor. :/

Manish Arora

Last season Manish Arora had a kind of Bladerunner thing going on (some of it spectacular), but this year's theme appears to be: the movie Thor mated with the 1960s. First up, magical sparkly space-viking armour dresses:

*wipes away tear* I'm sorry, you guys. I just really love Thor, OK. It makes no attempt whatsoever to be adult or dark. Instead it gives you Chris Hemsworth riding a space-horse across a bridge made of rainbows, and Anthony Hopkins wearing a gold eyepatch:

The tragic tale of a young outcast dealing with his father's betrayal, and his conflicted relationship with his dumb-but-sweet brother who likes to hit things with a big hammer. In a world where everyone wears impractically voluminous capes and sparkly armour at all times, despite having perfected intergalactic travel and having magical powers. Why that movie didn't end with Loki and Thor, a) hugging tearfully, and b) becoming co-rulers of Asgard with Loki doing logistics and Thor making public appearances with his shiny shiny hammer, I just do not understand.

Look at those eyes, Thor. Why can't you two just get along?
 Anyway, check out that colour palette of iridescent metallic whatsits and tell me it isn't a tad Asgardian:

Shoulder-armour always makes me wonder about the chicken-or-egg situation regarding the relationship between sci-fi and reality. As in: jules Verne invents the submarine; Star Trek invents the fliptop mobile phone; Minority Report invents those rad touchescreen computers that actually look kind of tiring to use in real life unless you're an orchestral conductor. Which came first: silly catwalk fashion shoulder-armour, or the kind you get in every post-apocalyptic action movie ever?
Poor baby
If you've got a female character who has to do a bunch of fighting, you can be certain three things will be covered: her vagina, her nipples, and her shoulders. I guess vagina and nipples because you don't want to be censored, and shoulders to prove that she's a Fighter without having to do anything so sensible as, say, cover any internal organs. Not that I want to hate on Xena's "armoured" outfit, of course, because Xena is awesome. But you know what? Here's another thing I liked about Thor: Sif's entire body was covered with just as much armour as her bros-in-arms, and she actually looked less silly than several of them. Hello, Loki looks like he could be defeated by a low doorway.